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IMI used to think being kind meant being flexible and accommodating. But that often created confusion. For them, and for me. A vague yes is not kindness!
A lot of sensible, responsible people do this. You don’t want to disappoint anyone, or seem difficult. So instead of saying no clearly, you say “we’ll see”, “let me get back to you”.
Which sounds nicer in the moment, but usually makes things messier after. 😵💫
A reminder:
1. A delayed no is still a no (it creates more confusion around it). Also, open loops = exhausting for the brain.
2. Saying yes when you already mean no often turns into resentment. ❤️🩹
3. Leaving people in uncertainty does NOT actually protect them.
4. Ask yourself something simple: Am I saying yes bc I want to, or bc I do not want to deal with the AWKWARDNESS of saying no?
Twenty years of meditation and years of corporate high-stakes decisions taught me: people suffer more from unclear maybes than honest no’s.
🐑 Sometimes the kindest thing you can give someone is clarity.
Follow @imelda_j for clear thinking on boundaries and self-trust.
@imelda_j
