1.6K
MAWhat is deflection & why is it harmful?
Have you experienced deflection? How did you feel? Let us know in the comments.
#deflection #harmful #relationship #therapy #therapist #marriedtherapists #fyp #CapCut
@marriedtherapists
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BEDeflection 101…
#narcissist #deflection #emotionalabuse #coercivecontrol
@beyond.the.bruise
81.9K
THDeflection in relationships is a defense mechanism rooted in a wound of rejection. They fear taking accountability because their self esteem cannot handle feeling shame or guilt for something they did or how they impacted their partner. So they get defensive, deflect, and shift blame with tactics such as D.A.R.V.O
D.A.R.V.O
- Deny the behavior
- Attack the accuser (their partner)
- Reverse the Victim and Offender roles
So they immediately deny or deflect the behavior their partner is discussing by bringing something else up (like something their partner may have done instead) and changing the topic at hand. They victimize themselves and shift blame onto their partner. They attack their partner by making the conversation about them and what they do or have done. This turns the table and makes the conversation about their partner and how it's their fault. This successfully reverses the victim and offender roles. Leaving their partner to feel unheard, dismissed, invalidated, and hopeless to ever having repair and reciprocal accountability.
📚The Inner Work of Relationships book
- if you want to learn how to break the cycle of defensiveness and deflection, heal root cause wounds, and build better communication skills for a stable and healthy relationship, you can read The Inner Work of Relationships book. It's available on IG shop, TikTok shop and Amazon!
#deflect #deflection #blameshifting #narcissist #marriage #relationshipproblems #relationships #relationshipadvice #marriageadvice #communication
@theyogacouple
9.0K
LEHow to spot deflection ⬇️
Has this ever happened to you? Comment your thoughts!➡️
If you like this video follow for more! Posting videos on reels feed now!🫶🏽
#deflection #communication #boundaries #redflags #adviceforwomen #forthegirls
@legallyflo
225.6K
YOThe narcissist never wants to talk about their behaviour. A good way of never acknowledging what they do is to deflect the narcissist deflect any attempt to discuss their behaviour by making you seem like the problem.
Did this happen to you ? Comment below 👇🏽
#deflection #projection #narc #narcfree #covertnarcissist #covertnarcissism #narcissism #narcawareness #narcabuse #flyingmonkeys #gaslightingawareness #traumarecovery #traumabonding
@your_divorce_coach
1.5M
CHThis is an oldie but a goodie, which is why I’ve unearthed it again.
This is why you don’t even get in the ring with them.
They will always bend the rules to win by any means necessary.
They will always deflect, project, blame shift, talk in circles, DARVO you to avoid accountability like the plague.
This is why you never talk to them, you always ensure all communication is in writing and even then, they’ll deny everything, even when you have paper proof. But at least you won’t have circular conversations that exhaust you, as you can extricate yourself from the conversation at any time, and you also get to choose when you respond or don’t.
This is why you never JADE: justify, argue, defend or explain yourself.
This is why you keep everything BIFF: brief, informative, friendly and firm.
This is why you learn to respond and not to react with emotion leading the charge, but rather, with your logical brain taking charge.
This is why you keep everything as succinct as humanly possible.
This is why you only ever respond to messages that actually warrant a response, which means only ever issues pertaining to the children, and even those don’t necessarily require an immediate response.
This is why you have to create boundaries around your communication.
Communication is how narcissists gaslight you, manipulate you, exhaust you, confuse you, stress you out and control you. This is how they trigger you.
When you learn the art of communication and the rules of engagement on your terms, they have far less power over you.
And this is how you start to take back control and start winning on your terms.
#Fights #communication #gaslightingawareness #manipulation #projection #deflection #boundaries #healing #funny
@chantal.contorines.coaching
28.8K
THLastly, ask yourself “What does continuing to engage this way cost me?” #DefensiveBehavior #EmotionalAvoidance #DismissiveBehavior #Deflection #ConflictResolution Disclaimer: This is not therapy. Please seek support from a licensed mental health professional. This content is not one-size-fits-all or all-or-nothing advice everything is nuanced and context matters. Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and honor your lived experience.
@thebarefoottherapistt
74.6K
NOUsing blame as a shield…
#blame #accountability #conflict #communication #deflection #relationships #relationshipadvice #humor #notaprofessional #raw #nofilter #nofilterphilosophy #advice
@nofilterphilosophy
15.3K
TRWhataboutism is when accountability feels uncomfortable, so the conversation gets redirected to your past.
This is why it’s important to address issues as they happen. When things aren’t talked through in real time, they don’t disappear, they get stored, rehearsed, and later used as weapons.
It’s your responsibility to bring something up
when it feels right for you! Not only when someone is holding you accountable.
Healthy communication isn’t about keeping score. It’s about staying present, honest, and timely.
If you’ve stopped bringing things up because it feels pointless, that’s not you being dramatic. That’s your nervous system protecting you from another unresolved conversation.
Comment “THIS” if you know exactly what I’m talking about.
#emotionalintelligence #relationshipadvice #relationships #deflection #whataboutism
@truthtalksalot
48
FRYou're not crazy. Not exaggerating. Not too sensitive. You're dealing with deflection. Let's dismantle that. #GenerationalTrauma #Deflection #Gaslighting #MentalHealthAwareness #SelfAwareness #HealingJourney
@freedominyeshuaohio
15.8K
MIOne of my superpowers is that I can detect when someone is lying or being insincere. I’ve been almost scammed by two sociopaths in my life and encountered countless experiences being lied to, to finally realize that my intuition when I think someone is behaving “off” is usually on point.
I now honor that gut feeling, and do not wait to let my brain rationalize away the small red flags. Here are a few tips that can help you spot a liar. Of course - there are exceptions to the rules so take this with a grain of salt.
If you find yourself doubting your intuition. Try this. Recall a time when you were lied to. What parts of the interaction felt “off” but at the time you shrugged it off? Start examining past situations so that when the same signs present themselves in the future, you can start recognizing when you might need to be more aware.
I also know people who confuse being intuitive with being judgmental. It’s a skill to learn how to differentiate those two but that’s for another reel. 😝
@missamychan
4.0K
THWhen you finally speak up, you’re not looking for a fight, you just want to be heard. But instead of listening, the bully flips it on you. Suddenly, you’re “the problem” just for opening your mouth. That’s blame-shifting. It’s how bullies avoid accountability and keep control. But the truth is simple: asking to be heard is not a crime. Let’s make an echo that exposes blame-shifting for what it is… silencing in disguise.
#BlameShifting #BullyingAwareness #EmotionalAbuse #ToxicBehavior #Gaslighting #RelationalBullying #WorkplaceBullying #SiblingBullying #EchoMovement #StopBullying #BreakTheCycle #MentalHealthAwareness #Deflection #EmotionalBullying #TheEchoMovement #SocialBullying #Gaslighting #Manipulation
@the.echomovement
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