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DR🔥 A question I got recently in my free Facebook group The Love Doc Clients & Community (you should join if you haven’t 👀—this is where myself and my other coaches answer your burning questions in real time):
“Does the dismissive avoidant build resentment?”
My answer: yes… but not in the way you might think.
Dismissive Avoidants suppress resentment rather than express it. Why? Because growing up emotionally neglected taught them to push down big feelings.
And resentment is a big feeling. Left unchecked, it often spirals into even heavier emotions like anger, shame, and even contempt (a deeper “I can’t stand this” reaction). These emotions feel overwhelming—so the DA shuts them down. But here’s the catch: suppressing them only fuels more avoidance.
True change starts when the DA can begin acknowledging those emotions. That’s the first step. But acknowledgment alone isn’t enough. They need to give their nervous systems new, corrective experiences—that’s what I call building capacity.
This is exactly what I teach inside my programs. It’s not just about nervous system regulation—it’s about nervous system completion. That’s when healing sticks.
If this resonates, drop me a note and please come join our free community on Facebook and start getting the support you need. Secure love is possible. 💙
#DismissiveAvoidant #AttachmentStyles #AttachmentHealing #EarnSecureAttachment #AttachmentTheory #AvoidantAttachment #ConsciousRelationships #RelationshipCoaching #TheLoveDoc #AttachmentRecovery #SecureLove
@dr.sarahhensley
