38.6K
BLAs I get older I feel this more and more…
Choosing myself isn’t selfish- AND it doesn’t make me a bad person.
@blair.rachel.jones
#Sliceanddice
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COYou weren’t born to fit into someone else’s box.
It takes courage to show up boldly for the life you want and strength to fight for the life you truly deserve.
Next time you feel the need to apologize for where you’re at in life… remember that most people hide from authenticity and live with regret because of fear of other people’s opinions who don’t have to live with their decisions.
Be sure you’re not one of them.
🩷
@coppertonecowgirl
300
XOShe’s checking in on you… and she thinks you’re magic.
There was a version of you who dreamed bigger than she knew how to explain.
She didn’t have proof. She just felt something inside her…
that life was meant to be more.
That girl is still here. Watching the way you’ve grown.
The way you’ve become someone she would look up to.
Not because everything is perfect…but because you didn’t stop becoming.
So if your confidence feels shaky today…borrow hers.
See yourself through her eyes. Unfiltered, unapologetic and
limitless. Because the truth is…you didn’t lose her. She’s still inside you… and she thinks you’re magic.
There was a version of you who dreamed bigger than she knew how to explain.
She didn’t have proof. She just felt something inside her…
that life was meant to be more.
That girl is still here. Watching the way you’ve grown.
The way you’ve become someone she would look up to.
Not because everything is perfect…but because you didn’t stop becoming.
So if your confidence feels shaky today…borrow hers.
See yourself through her eyes. Unfiltered, unapologetic and
limitless. Because the truth is…you didn’t lose her. Shes still inside of you.
Save this for the days you forget your power.
And share it with someone who needs to see themselves the way they were always meant to.
@xo.sarahsundari
@xo.sarahsundari
3.6K
KASometimes the comments that shape us the most weren’t meant to hurt us.
They came from parents who wanted us to “be better,” look better, do better.
But when a child grows up constantly corrected or evaluated, they don’t learn confidence—they learn to second-guess themselves.
The real work as an adult is unlearning the voice that taught you were never quite enough.
I opened a few private 60-minute breakthrough sessions this month.
DM the word “BREAKTHROUGH” and I’ll send you the booking link.
@katesellscreator
47
BEThat feeling didn’t come out of nowhere.
For some women, it started early.
Not feeling safe.
Not feeling chosen or protected.
If you are like me, you learned how to adapt.
I became agreeable, the easy kid.
And it followed me into adulthood by:
People pleasing.
Over-functioning.
Questioning myself.
Often feeling like I’m still not enough.
These patterns don’t just disappear
because you’ve grown up.
They take awareness.
And a different kind of relationship with yourself.
If this resonates, you’re not alone.
@beth_book_
137
IAShe told me something that shifted the way I see people forever:
Everyone has a table in their life.
And the ones who truly value you?
They make room the second you show up.
They notice when you’re standing,
they slide over without hesitation,
they want you there.
But some people…
they’ll keep you hovering on the edge,
waiting for permission,
feeling like your presence is a burden.
And that’s when you realise:
if you have to beg for a chair,
you’re simply sitting at the wrong table.
I spent so long trying to earn space I should’ve already had.
Shrinking, softening, proving myself - for a seat that was never meant for me.
But I shouldn’t have had to audition.
I deserved a place just by being myself.
And once that clicked?
I felt free.
A reminder to anyone who needs it:
Don’t fight for space in rooms that treat you like an afterthought.
Don’t chase tables where your chair is always missing.
Go where you’re welcomed - not just tolerated.
Your seat exists. You just haven’t sat at the right table yet.
Follow @iammichellestephenson if this resonates ✨
@iammichellestephenson
829
HOI still remember the moment I realized my entire personality was a trauma response.
I’d been doing a lot of work on myself over the years.
Learning about my patterns, my coping strategies, and all the ways I learned to adapt and protect myself without even realizing that’s what I was doing.
And doing the deep work to rewire these old, outdated ways of being.
And simultaneously…
being constantly bombarded by this message to “just be yourself.”
We hear it all the time in the personal growth world — “just be yourself”.
Be authentic.
Show up as you are.
And I really started thinking about that.
Who am I… really?
And when I actually got honest with myself, I realized that so much of what I had thought was “just who I am” wasn’t really me at all.
The people pleasing.
The perfectionism.
The hyper-independence.
The over-achieving.
The need to keep everyone comfortable.
Those survival strategies that I had adapted when I was younger- that were the ways I learned to feel safe- had literally become my entire personality.
And I know I’m not alone in this.
The vast majority of society is walking around performing a version of themselves that was built in survival mode… and thinking this is just ”who they are”
The work I have been doing the past several years has been peeling back the layers and remembering who I was before I started contorting myself to feel safe and be accepted.
This is now also the work I do with my clients.
Like my client Lin who has learned how to speak up and use her voice again, instead of shrinking and people pleasing.
And here’s what I’ve come to realize.
The real work isn’t becoming someone new.
It’s about taking off the masks.
It’s about being who you want to be vs who you think you ”should” be
And unbecoming all of the aspects of your personality that were never really you.
How many aspects of your personality are deep down truly you?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
#identityshift #authentic💯 #survivalmode #somatichealing #nurseentrepreneur
@holistic.nurse.michelle
5.6K
BLIt’s a weird place to be when people tell you that you look good… but deep down, that’s not the compliment you’d give yourself.
Not because you’re being vain.
Not because you’re ungrateful.
But because you know your own standard.
So now- it’s your choice of what you’re going to DO about it. The discomfort of staying the same. Or the discomfort to change.
@blair.rachel.jones
4.8K
HARaise your hand if you’re a people pleaser to the point where it’s actually a detriment 🙋🏼♀️
Being “selfish” was never easy for me. Growing up as the middle child, I learned to compromise a lot. To the point where I sometimes lost my own opinions, or felt guilty even having them. Even little things, like picking where to eat, felt uncomfortable if it meant going against someone else.
You’d probably look at me and my life, my job, and think I have no issue standing up for myself or speaking my mind. But a lot of the time, that’s just a front of who I want to be, not who I fully am yet. Underneath, it can still feel really uncomfortable to say what I truly think or want, worried it might not please everyone. And that’s a tiring, endless cycle, because it’s never going to happen.
One day, I realized I had been putting myself last for far too long, and something in me shifted. I started choosing myself. Not in a dramatic, overnight way, but in small, intentional ways.
It still feels uncomfortable sometimes. It’s a daily balance between being selfless and staying true to what I actually want and need. I’m learning how to use my voice again, how to express my opinions without guilt, how to advocate for myself.
Because the truth is, I just want everyone to be happy. I don’t like conflict. I don’t like feeling misunderstood. But life isn’t that simple, and if you’re not careful, you can wake up one day feeling completely pushed past your limit.
Choosing yourself isn’t selfish. It’s necessary. And I’m finally building a life that feels like mine.💕
#motivation #inspiration #inspirational #growth #growing
@hayleylewis_sports
8
BRPretending to be someone that you’re not or live a life that you don’t seems very cringe to me. You’re not even living your life if you’re out here playing and act and putting on a front, that seems like it would feel so uncomfortable every day, to just not be genuinely you…..ick. I’ve always been genuinely me. I’ve just never felt comfortable expressing it because I was made to feel like being genuinely me was wrong. — no, putting on a façade, a whole fake act, lying is what you’re doing — fabricating and exaggerating. That’s wrong. Doing what you like wearing what you like being you and having personal expression…. Because you hear that word? Personal. Personal expression. Exactly. I’m not going to ever water myself down again to try to fit in anyone else’s box. Their box is nothing to me. It has nothing to do with my life. I live in my box. My life, my one and only life I get here on this earth that I am blessed and so grateful to wake up to you every day to have with my amazing children and husband, whom I love so much that remind me of who I am every day and empower me to be just that, me. Fully and wholeheartedly, authentically and unapologetically. — and I do the same to them. I remind them every day to go out and sprinkle their personality and their characteristics everywhere they go, never change their opinions, their thoughts, and who they truly are to their core, because that’s what makes them them! Don’t let the world change you, don’t let anyone in this world change you, because they are uncomfortable and their skin, you let them deal with that on their own time and their own world. That’s their problem not yours. You never dim your light to make anyone feel comfortable you keep shining. This is your life. This is your one life on this earth. You shine as bright as you possibly can and if they don’t like it, they can look away. Point blank. PERIOD. #TruthMatters #authenticity #facebookpostシ
@brittanyrachelle1992
120
KA💛 If you grew up being the “good girl,” this is for you.
The perfectionism, people-pleasing, over-functioning… These aren’t personality traits, they’re armor you put on as a little girl who learned her worth depended on being easy, helpful, and never too much.
I know because I was that little girl.
The one who performed, made herself small, believed love was something she had to earn by being good enough.
And then I became a mom…And motherhood cracked that armor wide open.
Because I just couldnt keep it up anymore. I couldn’t keep pleasing everyone, couldn’t keep over-functioning without completely breaking.
Instead I had to face it. The patterns I’d been running since childhood, the belief that my worth was tied to how well I performed, how little I needed, how good I was.
And I had to learn something radical: I am worthy exactly as I am. Messy, imperfect, and completely human.
That’s the work I do now. Healing the little girl who thought love was conditional. Teaching my nervous system that I’m safe even when I disappoint people, even when I say no, even when I’m not “good.”
And here’s what I’ve learned: when I give myself permission to be whole instead of perfect, I give my kids permission too. When I model that my needs matter, they learn theirs do too.
This work isn’t just for me. It’s for them too.
So if you’re reading this and you see yourself in it - the good girl who became the overwhelmed mom - I want you to know: you don’t have to keep carrying that armor.
You were always enough.
⬇️ Tell me in the comments if this is your story too
Hi 👋 I’m Kari, an embodied life coach that helps overwhelmed moms heal from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and over-functioning so they can show up whole instead of depleted.
If this resonates, follow along 🤍
@kari.kazer
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